When Punk Rockers Get Old.

On April 21 2007, I had the pleasure of spending the evening with Iggy Pop on his 60th Birthday.

Mr. Misha and I, along with another couple, went to San Francisco to see Iggy and The Stooges in concert. We didn't know it was his birthday until we arrived. As we walked into the venue, the ticket takers handed out "Happy Birthday Iggy" buttons. We put our buttons on our lapels and waited for the show to start. I don't even remember if there was an opening band. All I remember was that all of a sudden-------THERE HE WAS.


All 5 foot 7 inches of him. Long, straight, light brown hair. Skin tight, low-rise jeans. Bare Chest. He ran, danced, sang, STAGE DIVED, jumped up and down; he did not stop moving for almost 2 hours. Even when the crowd sang Happy Birthday to him, he frolicked around the stage as black balloons emblazoned with his face fell from the ceiling.


Before we had gone to the show, I had been feeling a bit old. It was a few months before my 20th high school reunion. Seeing Iggy bound around the stage all night, full of energy and joy was like a tonic. I have been cruising along after that night in a bit of denial. I kept thinking to myself, "I'm not that old." Even when I had patients who were born the year I graduated from high school come in to deliver their babies, I still kept thinking, "I am still young."


Then I saw Belinda Carlisle on Dancing With The Stars. On August 17, 2008 she turned 50, a whole DOZEN YEARS younger than Iggy and a little more than a decade older than me. Don't get me wrong, she looked beautiful. But she MOVED old. She moved slower. She moved like she ached. She moved like I felt some mornings when I first get up or after a long shift of baby birthin'. It bugged me.


Look how cute she was dancing here:
The Go-Go's in 1984


Now look at her here:
Belinda Carlisle in 2009. I guess all the wild times of drugs and debauchery weighed more heavily on Belinda than they did on Iggy. Poor thing got booted off DWTS tonight. I am sad to see her go, but it serves her right for making me feel this way. I feel decrepit.

Why Are You Yelling At Me?

Products I will never purchase because their commercials annoy me:
American Taxpayer Associates, Vonage and Nutrisystem- their commercials are significantly louder than the ones that precede or follow them. These commercials are so loud that they have actually waked* me up from a sound sleep. It pains me to say, that Bare Minerals commercials are too loud also. But since I bought their product before their commercials tried to deafen me, I will forgive them. I LOVE MY Bare Minerals!

Enzyte- that fucking whistling is annoying. But if you turn off the sound- the visuals are kinda funny in a Bevis and Butthead kinda way.

Products with doorbells in their commercials- Swiffer Wet Jet, Windex and Domino's Pizza. Every time these commercials appear on my television and the doorbell sound goes off, both Harley and Mimi become ballistic. Barking, running to the door, spinning in circles. When they realize that no one has come to visit them, they look so forlorn. It's a wonder why both of my pooches are not psychotic by now.
Viagra- the Viva Viagra song. Ruined the Elvis original for me permanently.
Liberator Medical- I am a nurse. I put urinary catheters in all the time. But for some reason, the way the woman in the commercial says catheter and urinary infection, skeeves me out.
Liberty Medical with Wilford Brimley- Dude, it is pronounced DIE-A-BEET-EASE, not DIE-A-BEAT-US. I want to smack him when he says it that way. It could only be worse if he said, "I got the sugar problem or I got The Die-a-beat-us".
Tony Little and his Gazelle- To quote in late, great musician, Wesley Willis, "Cut the mullet". It's like he is trying to be the macho version of Richard Simmons.
The Sham-WOW guy- seriously, he is very patronizing to the camera operator. And he yells.

Speaking of yellers, The Oxyclean, Orange glow, Kaboom and now Health Insurance hawker.........Billy Hayes- the king of the cranked up, screaming TV Hawkers. Dude, layoff the Red Bulls and Starbucks!

So, what's bugging you lately?

* I thought I should use the word "woke", but grammar check says "waked" is the correct one. Any opinions on that?