I was raised as an only child. Liz was raised with three brothers. All the shit they gave her, she passed on to me. Once Liz found your weak spot, she went after it with a zeal she usually reserved for Patriots, Bruins, Celtics and Red Sox games. One St. Patrick's Day, Liz decided that the way I blew my nose was weird. The way I held my kleenex was weird. The sound I made when I blew my nose was weird. My nostrils were weird. Of course, she didn't stop there. I was also not wearing enough green that day. So she kept pinching me and otherwise berating me for not celebrating enough. Liz didn't care that I wasn't Irish. I was her bestie, so I was automatically Irish and needed to embrace the day.
I just happened to have a horrible sinus infection that weekend. I felt like shit and I really wasn't in the mood for Liz's teasing. But I had agreed to go to some shoe store in Oakland with her, so I was trapped in a car with a bullying Irish girl who was determined to harass me until I died. On and on she went each time I blew my nose. I had to do something to shut her up. But what could I do? I pondered this problem while she went on and on until it came to me. I waited until we were parked in front of the shoe store. I grabbed a kleenex, blew as hard as I could into it and before she could start giving me shit about it-
I opened up the kleenex, showed her the contents, which were, in fact, BRIGHT GREEN and yelled,
"HAPPY FUCKING ST. PATRICK'S DAY!"
She left me alone the rest of the day.
Mr. Misha and I went to see our tax lady last night. 2008 was a pretty shitty year for us financially. Since folks had very little disposable income, Mr.Misha's business was slow. Because of my work related injury last April, my income was really low. I didn't realize how little we were living on until it was all out there on her desk. It was a pretty sorry sight. For the first time since we have been married, Mr. Misha and I will be getting a refund. As we were signing our returns, Mr. Misha looked at me and said, "Who knew being poor would be so profitable for us?" I smiled until I realized we would see none of it. It will all go towards the taxes we still owe from previous years. That sucks.
Happy St. Patrick's Day!
